Learning About PTSD 2

Support for Survivors

Those of us who know people who are survivors, and have PTSD because of what they have survived, will always want to help them. But, understanding our loved one who suffers is key. 

We must remember that trauma survivors with PTSD sometimes exhibit the following conditions: 

• Trouble with relationships/friendships since PTSD can cause problems with trust, closeness, communication or problem solving. 

All of the problems listed here can affect how those whom we love, and who have PTSD, may act toward us and others. And vice versa, the responses of others to the survivors and their quirks can then affect the survivors negatively. 

• Depending upon how others react to them, survivors with PTSD may come to feel—distant from others, numb toward others, they have no interest in social/sexual activities, irritable, on guard, jumpy, worried, nervous, unable to relax or overprotective of loved ones. 

So, try to remain calm when survivors with PTSD come across as tense/demanding. Try to consider where these traits have originated. Flashbacks /trauma memories may affect sleep and intimate relations. And along with all the rest, little sleep can increase the survivor’s struggles to include intense anger or intense impulses. Intervention by professionals is therefore paramount to their coping with their difficulties.  

Once survivors have identified some of their triggers, avoidance of those triggers becomes important to their futures. Triggers to traumatic memories can be as simple as an anniversary date of the trauma. Avoidance is not always easy. 

Supporting survivors is shown in my memoir, Adytum by Mary Cools. In the book, the importance of relationships with others is shown as strengthening for all involved with PTSD. Strong relationships for survivors can: 

1. Protect some survivors from actually developing PTSD 

2. Offset feelings of being alone in the survivor (I suffer from feelings of being alone and my husband saves me!) 

3. Develop the survivor’s self-esteem 

4. Reduce the survivor’s depression and guilt (My guilt sometimes consumes me—until I find someone to talk it out with) 

If your loved one is in crisis: 

• Call 911 – if you feel fire, police or emergency medical teams are needed 

• Contact a Suicide and Crisis Lifeline if needed (an operator can help) 

• There are also “Veterans' Crisis Lines” (again, an operator can help) 

• Hospital emergency rooms can help in times of immediate need. And, doctors there can connect survivors with trained PTSD therapists. 

REMEMBER: 

Only a doctor who is experienced at helping those with mental illnesses (i.e. a psychiatrist or a psychologist) can diagnose PTSD. And, diagnosis is an initial step toward wholeness.